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Stephen Speck

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Writer's Block: There Can Be Only One [May. 22nd, 2009|08:08 am]
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Do you believe in monogamy?


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I do believe in monogamy. Marriage is a huge, lifetime commitment. Even if I didn't grow up with the Catholic mindset that you get married once, and to only one person, I don't imagine it's easy to split that kind of commitment amongst multiple partners.

I realize modern usage of the term "monogamy" doesn't only apply to marriages. With respect to this more general usage, I think that sexual polygamy is ultimately unsustainable. It's unsafe for all parties involved. And even in a perfect world where STDs were eradicated, there's the emotional costs. Someone is going to feel neglected. Someone is going to get jealous. It's not a matter of logic (unless by logic, you mean to say this is an evolutionary adaptation); people form attachments to their partner, and usually don't like to share. Monogamy is just a good idea, irrespective of one's religious or ethical inclinations.
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Comments:
[User Picture]From: [info]oohimesama
2009-05-22 03:54 pm (UTC)

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Word.
I was gonna answer this but you sum it up perfect.
[User Picture]From: [info]frito_kal
2009-05-22 04:07 pm (UTC)

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Lol, Catholic mindset. Even Catholics have a way to get out of marriage if things go really bad - if I honestly gave enough of a crap, I could get my marriage annulled because of the reasons for the divorce.

Assuming safe sex, because it is possible to be safe with multiple partners - why are you assuming that people can't get past things like jealousy? Why are you assuming people can't balance multiple partners?

I am all for monogamy - I am monogamous, in part because I personally don't think that I can get past jealousy, and in part because more than 2 adults in this household would be a little bit awful.

BUT.

There's a world of difference between what I feel personally and what I think should be enforced for the whole rest of the adult world. If someone wants to try it - if three people really believe they can be happier, healthier and better people if they're in a 3- person relationship, why should that be stopped? Why shouldn't we allow them the freedom to succeed - or fail - on their own?
[User Picture]From: [info]hex_16
2009-05-22 05:38 pm (UTC)

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I've re-read what I wrote, and I fail to see where I advocated (en)forcing my views upon anybody. If someone thinks they can pull it off, more power to them. My thought was only to express what I thought were the caveats, and answer the question presented for myself.